We tend to forget that we only see the very best images of someone from the very best moments of their lives.

Real talk here.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been personally victimized by Regina George Instagram?  Fess up, we know we all have scrolled through the ‘Gram and wished we had someone else’s life at some point. We stalk others, like their photos, and forever loathe them for their stomach/arms/booty/boyfriend/life. Whether the person on the internet that you are stalking is either: 1.) A celebrity 2.) A girl who you know through another friend 3.) A totally rando; there are several things I want to address and for you to keep in mind.

We need to STOP comparing ourselves to strangers on the internet. Seriously guys, this is such a 3rd world problem, but it is so REAL. For one, these chicks that we stalk and wish we were only post the most gorgeous, flattering photos of themselves. I’m sure at some point, someone has seen your photos online and has been jealous of you! The internet land is wonderful because it connects us to individuals all over the world, but it’s also a dagger to our self-esteem. We go round and round with the comparison game, never quite feeling content with our own lives; wishing our lives away to be like an individual whom we have never even met.

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Why is this so dangerous?

1.) We fail to distinguish real life and reality.

We are stuck in our own cultural wasteland of fake images and perceptions that aren’t even real. We see photos but these photos are either shots of models or, if the person is “real,” a person’s very best shot of themselves. These images were personally hand-chosen, edited, and captioned perfectly by the person who post to create a perfectionistic image. In many cases, these images are even photoshopped models!

We only see edited images of someone from the very best moments of their lives.

2.) We forget to practice gratitude 

When we put ourselves down because of what we see on the Internet, we lose sight of what really matters- the things that we have. We forget how grateful we are for the simple things. For our healthy bodies and all that they for us; our families who love us more than we’ll ever know, our friends who would jump off a bridge for us; the roof over our head. We forget about the beautiful things that we, in fact, DO have.

I’ll be the first to admit that being a fashion blogger, I tend to compare myself- A LOT- to strangers on the Internet. Whether I’m scrolling through my Insta feed to get inspiration or reading other blogs, I can be the first to testify to how easy it is get caught up in the comparison game. When you find yourself thinking this way, the best thing you can do is to put the iPhone down and give yourself a break from your device.

3.) We fail to realize how wonderfully made we are

We are totally awesome just the way we are, and in that moment that we decide that we wish we had a stranger’s life, we forget that. We were created perfectly and uniquely just the way you are. Darling, don’t let anyone tell you differently.

The moral of the story is; yes, there will always be someone that you’re jealous of on Instagram or Facebook. Just don’t let these posts control your life. Be smarter than the media, BBs.

Xoxo,

 

  • Seriously, lets! So much on the internet is just a well fabricated glimpse into someone’s life, not the whole picture. Nothing good comes of comparing.

    • Exactly. I’m glad that you are smarter than the internet!

  • A great inspirational post! I think this should be reflected in life too… You only ever see a snapshot of someone’s life, whether that’s on the internet or in real life. Just be yourself and enjoy what you’ve got. If you’ve not got what you want, go out and get it! :)

    • Enjoy what you have and limiting the social media works wonders. <3

  • Marissa Pedersen

    What a great post! This is so true – we never know what someone else is going through or how they got to a certain place in life.

    • No body posts about the dark moments of their life on social media!

  • Emily Vanderhoof

    Great reflective post. As I was reading it, I was thinking to myself how many of these do I do? I especially like the reminder to remember the simple things and be grateful for them. There are so many things we can be thankful for!

    • There really are SO many things to be thankful for. <3

  • It’s so true. Instagram can be downright depressing sometimes, but then I wonder how many hours it takes to get those perfect pictures and how it’s more enjoyable to actually be in the moment.

    • Just from a fashion blogger’s standpoint, I am guilty of getting those picture perfect photos and let me tell you, it’s a pain, and sometimes it takes 50 shots to just get one nice one!

  • Sarah Twain

    Wonderful post-it really does make you reflect. Sometimes it’s great to take a social media break!

    • <3 It does wonders to our mental health.

  • Kim

    Yes, I totally agree with this. Some times I realize that when I’m down on myself, I need to take a break from social media because I’ve realized that is my problem – I’m comparing myself to photoshopped models!

    • And that is totally destructive. I’m glad you realize when you have to take a break.

  • It’s like you’re reading my mind. The other day I was seriously getting frustrated because I kept looking at other accounts and noticing that their pictures were so pretty and I kept thinking mine weren’t as good. But I just need to stop worrying about it and just enjoy the things I post.

    • See that’s so funny, b/c I think your photos are gorgeous. We aren’t even aware of how awesome we are!!

  • Dia

    Truth! Very few people post the picks where they are hungover after the fun night. Or the fight they had with their bf after that super cute photo they took. We don’t see it all so don’t compare just the outside. Sharing

    • Or the awkward photo of themselves BEFORE the cute photo!!! HAHA

  • linda spiker

    Comparison is a thief of joy! Greta post and wise words!

  • Uhm, hell yes :) Thank you for sharing this. I feel as though this sentiment is going around a lot lately because it’s time we admit and relish in the fact that we are beautiful and perfect with all of our imperfections. Besides, those perfectly polished beautiful images? Don’t tell the entire story the way raw and real pictures do <3

    • Yes, you stated that perfectly; we don’t get the whole story! <3

  • Samantha

    Yes to all of this! Live your life, and be happy and proud of it! The comparison game only makes us miserable.

    • It truly does, and it’s hard to get over those thoughts once you have them!

  • I absolutely have a problem with comparing myself to the ladies on Instagram! You’re so right though, it’s definitely not reality!

    • We ALL do it!! Even the famous travel & fashion bloggers who have picture perfect lives!

  • Zana Djakovic

    Seriosuly, I am loving this post babe. I used to have that problem too until I became self-conscious. Even now, it’s a process but I am learning to appreciate myself and everything around me. We are all amazing just the way we are. :) <3

    • You are going a wonderful job of self reflection and self care. So proud of you!

  • Kathrina Cruz

    Loving this! I feel like everyone is so concerned about “curating” their lives that we forget to just live them and be real. Comparing only makes us all feel like we’re failing and lacking!

    • Exactly!!!! We forget to just live our lives and be authentic. So true.

  • We only see edited images of someone from the very best moments of their lives. <~~~ THIS QUOTE!!! I Love it! One of my favorite types of blogs is when bloggers show their "behind the instagram" and what is really going on. We like to think that other peoples lives are perfect but in reality they might struggle just like us! Love this post!

    • I know. I wish I could do more of that! It’s hard to just “be real” sometimes in today’s society, unfortunately.

  • SUCH a great post! Thanks for sharing this!

    • Thanks for reading, Tawni!

  • Yes girl! This post is so true and the first line…I DIED hahaha. Keep shining my love :)

  • Jessica Bradshaw

    YES!!! So true! I sure as heck don’t post the photos of me when I am devastated. It’s like you said…best moments of my life. I know others do the same. I don’t want to deprive myself of happiness or gratitude!

    • Yes, that’s exactly it!!!! You don’t post when you’re sad or angry. You need to remember that others do the same.

  • Deborah Ward

    This is great and so what I needed to hear right now! I get into these stupid slumps where I compare myself to others, and like you said, I forget just how badass I am! :-)

    • Yeah, seriously girl! Don’t forget how badass you really are!!

  • Neely

    YES YES YES! I think we all need this reminder!

    • It’s something we all need to remember!

  • ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!!!! This is so important to remember!

    • Thanks so much for reading, lady!

  • this is a great reminder for everyone, esp us who are always on the social media.

    • Yes. Thank you for stopping by! XO

  • Jessica Hughes

    This is so true, it’s easy to compare ourselves to others but in reality, most everyone posts only about 1/4 of their life on the internet!

    • Exactly. It’s so easy to get caught up doing that!

  • So well said! The comparison game is the worst – especially just looking at photos on social media!

    • Yeah. We need to remind ourselves about what’s really important.

  • Love this post! It’s so easy to compare ourselves to others, especially over the internet. This was a great reminder!

    • I’m glad you enjoyed! xo

  • PREACH sista. Love this, Chelsea. Comparison truly is the thief of joy and it’s SO easy to get caught in that trap. Thanks for the real talk!! :)

  • LOVE THIS Chelsea! So necessary and I think we all find ourselves doing this from time to time without realizing it even.

    xoxo, Jenny

    • It’s so hard to get caught up in the comparison game!

  • CrazyShenanigans

    Yes yes yes! Totally agree!

  • yes, yes yes!! this is so so important! I love this and I need to tell myself this constantly! Thank you for the much needed reminder.

    • I think it’s a reminder for us all!

  • Heather Gullett Denniston

    Great, Great, Great. Thank you for sharing!

  • 100% YES! Seriously, can’t we all just love each other for our own individuality and revel in our uniqueness? LOVE it!

  • Diana Catapang

    Yes, it’s a cliche, but we often forget that all of us have our own unique characters and personalities. Let’s shout it to the world guys! I am me, you are you!

    • We do forget! And we waste SO much time caring about others.

  • kandja sylla

    Being too active online can distort our reality of life. What your wrote is true since many pattern their lives based on what they see in social media. The result is we forget how to be grateful for the simple joys and blessings. Keep on inspiring hun!xx

    http://www.prettyweirdbombshell.com

    • That’s exactly it. Thanks so much for stopping by!

  • I loooove this post. This has been on my mind a lot recently. The whole culture of social media lends its hand so well to low self esteem. I actually wrote a piece on it recently. I’d love it if you checked it out, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the matter.

    http://happinessbrand.blogspot.com/2016/06/lets-get-social-self-love-no-1.html

    Also, your blog is radical! I’m so glad I stumbled across you today!
    xo. Holly Erinn

    • AW thanks Holly! Heading to your post right now ! May I ask how you stumbled across my blog? :)

  • This post hit so true to home. Comparison is such a dangerous thing, not only online, but in all areas of life! It is way too easy to get down on yourself for not being/looking/having what someone else does. What a great reminder that these things we covet are only a glimpse into the BEST moments of someones life, often times edited and captioned perfectly, and not always a clear version of reality. Great post :)

    • Aw thank you so much, Katie! I appreciate you stopping by and leaving such thoughtful comments on my site. I think ALL women struggle with this from time to time. For me, I need to limit my media usage sometimes.